Going Nowhere

     I want to start by saying the the second half of yesterday's post was littered with spelling and grammatical errors. I tend to be a 'Grammar Nazi,' because I would think that being able to write and speak in one's first language should be something people should do correctly? Wouldn't you think?? I will obviously try to refrain from such atrocities in the future. Now onto my day...

     Today was a slightly odd day. Last night, we had to migrate from Colin's basement to my car (I think I need to stop saying things that can be misconstrued as being homosexual. I don't feel like being ridiculed). We were discussing different concepts and subjects and at times we were loud. Colin suggested that we go get milk shakes and that is precisely what we did.

     After we came back, we decided to just stay out in the car and continue our discussions. I left the electronics on so we would stay warm. Colin finally went inside and went to bed at about 3:30 AM or so. Kozi and I meanwhile discussed Tribeca Flashpoint Academy, which is where Kozi went to school and where I will be heading after I graduate from SIU with my BA. What I'll be studying during my stay there is still in flux. It's currently between video editing, cinematic directing, and/or game producing. I feel I would be pretty descent at any of them. This may be tooting my own horn a bit, but I'll link my past couple of Halo trailers that I made:

     Anyway, we talked until about 5:00 AM or so. Kozi and I finally decided to call it a night... er, morning, I suppose. When I tried to turn on the car, all that could be heard was a single click, followed by an unwelcome silence. My car battery was dead... The tone suddenly became one of being tired to one that said, "Welp... fuck." Kozi thankfully happened to have jumper cables. The only problem was that neither Kozi nor myself are car people by any stretch of the imagination...

     We barely managed to turn Kozi's car around, which was parked in by myself and Colin's cousin's car. Turning his car around was something akin to the scene in the original Austin Powers movie when Austin gets the cart stuck in the hallway and he keeps driving into and backing into each wall of the hallway. The connection was not lost on us as it was pretty much the first thing we thought of. Once we finally got the car turned around, we popped the hoods and got the jumper cables from Kozi's trunk. They were zip-tied... Of course they were zip-tied... The closest thing to a knife or scissors that we had were our car keys. Using that may as well have been a joke. Then suddenly, an idea! What if we used the sharp clamps to free themselves? It worked like a charm. Now onto actually trying to jump the car. We searched my car for the battery, but to no avail... What we thought was my car battery eventually turned out to be my car's fuse box. Who knew? We began laughing at ourselves as we compared ourselves to the apes in the beginning of 2001: A Space Odyssey. We couldn't have been more out of our element, sans critical thinking and improvisation. But eventually, we would yield ourselves.

     It was now 6:00 AM and we were still stuck in Colin's driveway, trying to be quiet as not to wake anyone up and trying to be as inconspicuous as possible to the various cars that drove by. The flashlight looking through a dark, turned-off car was not helping. So we finally gave up. My car was dead, and we, not being able to revive it, were forced to abandon the corpse where it lay... Kozi drove me home where I passed out for another 7 hours.

     I awoke with a splitting headache, most likely due to staying up so late/early. My left forearm felt as though someone had hit it with a bat and my legs were so achy that, at first, it was difficult to walk. These were obviously due to the swamp renovations from the previous day. With no one available to help me go save my car, I was marooned on the island that is my house. *Sigh...* I would have to wait until someone with a car came home. My dad was first on the list. When he got home, we called AAA and we would meet them at Colin's house. However, when we got there, we were able to jump it ourselves. I called AAA again and cancelled the service dude that was probably already on his way to come help us out. I felt somewhat bad, as we had pretty much just sent this guy on a wild goose chase. Where ever you are, I apologize for wasting your time. We then proceeded to take my car back to the dealership to go get some work done and to get things checked out, which was actually our plan before any of this had happened. So yet again, I am without a car...

     I'd like to note that the guy at the dealership that waved my car into the service garage was so outwardly happy, though I feel as though there may have been something slightly out of the ordinary going on. I supposed he may have been tripping on something, or, the more likely, he was possibly somehow handicapped. Either way, he was as happy as could be and had a huge grin on his face the entire time we were there. That's nice to see.

     However, once I got back home, I finally got my hands on the Halo 4 concept art (which is signed by Sparth). Oh, the joyousness of it; another one-of-a-kind piece of Halo piece has been added to my collection. When I got onto twitter, I saw that there was a community playdate for Halo tonight. @bsangel had tweeted that those whom she followed should send her a message via xbl saying simply, "twitter." I did so, though I decided on adding a 'meow' afterwards. I thought Jessica may appreciate this tiny gesture, and it seems I was correct. It wasn't even 2 minutes after I sent it that I got the invite. I was pretty pumped, as this was the first time in a LONG time that I've played Halo matchmaking, let alone the first time I was able to get into the community playdate party. Jessica recognized me and we caught up slightly and I apologized about outbidding her on the Halo 4 concept art. She was a great sport about it and said that, 'at least it was going to a good home where it would be cared for.' That's actually the third time in like two weeks that I've heard that about something I was bidding on. I love hearing stuff like that because it means that; 1. I seemed to have gained a reputation amongst the Halo community as a hunter of rare Halo pieces that cares deeply for them; and 2. It's a good reputation.

     So we played a few games and I tried fairly hard, as I didn't want to be seen as being a 'BK randy.' The fact that some people (& I suppose more now) know that I really don't play all that much Halo online, let alone gaming on a regular basis. I got a few nice kills here and there, even nice enough for people to complement me on them. The few jokes I made here and there were well received also, which is always a good ego-booster.

     Well, I suppose this is where I'll end. And to think, my original plan today was to actually blog about a big theory that I came up with, while only briefly talking about my car. Oh well... Tomorrow I should be getting my car back and depending on what happens tomorrow, I will be organizing my entire Halo collection into something more display worthy. If things go as planned, I will be starting my big Halo blog. Although I will say ahead of time that my mom, who is a kindergarten teacher is having the school's annual holiday faculty party at our house tomorrow... So things may not go my way on that front... I can only be thankful as this is the last year for this because my mom is retiring after this school year's end.

     I gotta say, yesterday's song choice was good and all, but I went through my ipod today in preparation for this blog and I found like three other songs that would've worked so much better. Oh well, what's done is done. Tonight's song is "Going Nowhere," by Cut Copy. And yes, I know. I have been using a lot of Cut Copy songs. This isn't to promote it so much as I just find that the titles fit what I happen to be talking about. I am trying to use some variety in my song choices, just need to write about the right thing. Anyway, enjoy!

     I think tomorrow I am going to finally start Christmas shopping. I also think I'm going to finish it all in record time. *Yawn* I'm tired... I suppose I should try and get my sleep schedule back in order before I fuck it up even more.

Until next time...

Feel the Love

     I just finished listening to the Joe Rogan Experience podcast which had Kevin Smith guest starring. For those who don't know, I have semi-close family relations with Kevin, not close enough however to where it's really anything like we see each other often. We've only talked a handful of times. Anyway, they talked about very interesting concepts about human physiology and the effects of drugs on people and other things like concepts of philosophy and the future and lost and forgotten pasts of Humanity. So I'm feeling very creatively inspired. I must take advantage of this. Let's channel that with the good stuff that's been happening lately into a nice little blog, shall we?

     I feeling good right now. Lots of good things have come since that awful final the other day. My grade came in for it... A 29/50, BUT I did manage to pass to class, so all remains well. I've just decorated my room and family room with some colorful xmas lights and even turned our rubber ficus into an awesome rainbow xmas tree (not to mention I broke a sweat putting up all the lights, so it's helping my weight loss as well, albeit only a tiny bit). 

     Thanks to a friend at the Child's Play Auction dinner, I was able to purchase a one-of-a-kind piece of concept art from Halo 4, and it's signed by Sparth no less! If you watch the Halo 4 concept art trailer, it's the one with the UNSC ships dropping into the mysterious Forerunner world. I can't thank my friend enough because yet again she has come through for me in so many more ways than she has to, mostly because she doesn't have to at all. She cares for the fans, and that's such a great thing to know. To know that the fans are cared about so much only makes me trust those in charge of it all even more. If you're reading, you're the best. Now onto more happiness, yes?

     I was out getting gas earlier on just before going to buy the lights and while I was standing there next to my car, I could here this girl talking to someone or something. She sounded so happy. There was a car waiting behind me because there were no open pumps. I couldn't help but make charismatically confused faces to the girl for his amusement. I don't know if he ever saw, but I hope he did and thought to himself, "hah, that guy can make some good faces." Anyway, while I stood next to my car, she suddenly hops out from behind my car and we make eye contact. "Oh!," I think to myself. She is very, very, VERY pretty and cute. Imagine Olivia Munn with less freckles and longer hair. She was also wearing a hippy-ish sun dress. Oh, she knows what I like. Obviously a free-spirited type who thinks more openly than most and has awesome and interesting tastes and music and cool concepts to talk about and neat stuff to go do. And she probably goes for more unconventional looking guys like myself because she's an adventurous woman. I make a brief smile, which clearly paled in comparison to her naturally lit up face, already smiling. She continues walking with an obvious spring in her step. She takes her eyes off me and looks ahead as she walks toward the small booth to pay.

     A guy is in front of her paying for his gas. Good, this way I can still watch her. Do I talk to her? I don't generally do that unless I'm on adderall. I remain standing, contemplating complementing her in some way that will start a conversation. She bends over slightly, throwing her hair forward and then back running her fingers through its waves. She gives an audible happy sigh of relief. The guy in front of her finally walks away and she steps up to the booth. "Hello," she exclaims to the guy in the booth, whom I can only imagine is miserable because his day is stuck out in a tiny booth while it's 30 degrees out and he's surrounded by candy that constantly tempts him as he hears their whispers in the back of his head. And then finally, at night, with no sun to even remotely warm him, when all seems lost to him in this life, this girl comes to his booth. A human embodiment of the sun itself. He should feel like he's come into contact with that which he can only describe as god, changing his life forever, knowing that despite the constant shit storm that surrounds him, there is still some sort of hope out there, moving around the world spreading the natural joy that emanates from her very presence. A single person that can change the world. This guy should feel what I feel right now.

     ....but he doesn't change his manner at all. He continues to sit there, almost motionless, as stoic as a rock. She gets her change and begins moving back in my direction. The man in the booth will remain their for the rest of his days; dying alone in the cold, because he didn't take advantage of the opportunity which is now walking away from him. Will I be different? Her eyes are already upon me as I stare almost blankly. She looks down for the briefest of moments, but as if in slow motion, her head raises, eyes on me, instantly seductive, a lock of hair falls over her right eye and she brushes it back. I try my best to smile even harder, not like a crazy person, no teeth showing, but enough to actually see a smile. I can't say anything though. Why? Why can't I say something like, "I like your dress and your hair and every bit about you from even the slightest of glances." As if it was an echo, she turned her head forward again and walked off, back towards her car. Now I was being left with the man in the booth. Neither of us would ever get this opportunity again. My eyes never leave her though as she trots back to her car. I should go over there. Yes. But my legs aren't moving. What the fuck was I doing?? The gas pump stops. I begin putting it back on the thing and close my gas tank, remembering the old man in the giant red pickup still patiently waiting behind me. I have to get in my car. Maybe I'll just pull around... But that seems so creepy and perverted somehow. Too many movies... It's done. I start my car and begin pulling forward. I can only imagine her watching my car as I pulled away from her...

     The thought of turning around remains, constantly trying to be reasoned out. I pull out onto the street, all hope of anything ever happening with this girl is slipping away, and evidently at my own hand. I pull into Lowes, where I wanted to get xmas lights for my room and our family room window and rubber ficus. We had been discussing it for a couple weeks and I wanted to take this opportunity of creativeness to my advantage. I ran in and got a couple boxes of 150-light stands of multi-color and practically run out of their as I check out. I'm going back. I can only hope that this girl is still there because she is so different from what I see. Everyday I see people who just look miserable with their lives and it bums me the fuck out. People need to be happier with their lives and their situations, and the fact that it's been cloudy and rainy and little snow isn't helping either. To even see someone like this girl, who seems so genuinely happy with her life and time. I need to go back there and meet her. I drive quickly back to the gas station, pull in and look at all the cars that pass, searching to see if she's in one of them. I don't know what I'm going to do when I get there though. What would I say that doesn't sound as creepy as can be? I don't care. I need to say something though, I need to at least try. 

     I'm back at the gas station, frantically search the cars near where she was presumably parked. Nothing. She was gone... My head down in shame, I drove back home. I came back and remedied the loss of the perfect woman by putting up lights in my room and family room. They actually ended up looking really good and I've gotten like five complements already. The more I thought, well, at least I know she exists. I was excited to tell my roommates about her because it was such an awesome experience to see someone like her. 

     My only hope now is that I see her again somewhere because I know if I do, I will say something for sure.

     This is where I'll end for tonight. And again, I apologize to those awaiting my Halo blog, which I think will be in two parts due to the overall length of it. I leave you with Cut Copy's, "Feel the Love." You may remember I mentioned it in my previous blog. It's my favorite song ever. Enjoy.

Until next time...

Lights and Music

     Now, we know how to name, and we know what drives how we choose. So what do I choose? Well, the most prevalent things in my life are school, Halo, and dancing. Let's get the small stuff out of the way first, as they won't be my focus today.

     The fall semester here at SIU is just about over, with finals now on top of the student body. And if you imagined finals as being a person, literally on top of another person (who is the aforementioned student body), then good. That's what I was hoping you'd picture because that's pretty much how it went for me today with my first final. It was an absolute fucking disaster. Where the other 3 tests were at about a 6/10 in difficulty, the final, which was only half cumulative bumped the difficulty way the fuck up to about a 20/10... The proverbial A-Bomb dropped directly on my head... We'll see how my grade ends up soon hopefully. And hopefully the other finals won't be so god damn meticulous. But I digress.

     The Halo subject, however? Well, I got some great news, which has the potential to end even greater, but I won't know that for a couple more hours. I can't say much else at this point however. All I know is that I forever love 343i and the people working there; one in particular, without whom none of my Halo-rific feats would not have been achievable. If they happen to be reading this, I still can't thank you enough for the opportunities you've granted me, and I owe you so much more than you think. <343

     Now, as I feel that the overall subject of Halo would probably end up making a given blog about twice as long as my previous ones, I will leave that for another day, perhaps very soon, perhaps tomorrow? So do not fret, random Halo fan that is reading this in hopes of me telling my stories, including the whole 117 debacle. All your (possibly) burning questions will be answered soon. And I know there's at least a couple of you out there who have requested that I write about it. I will Never Forget. (hah, see what I did there?)

     The primary subject of today's blog is about dancing. Now, before I get into my story, I've always like the movement of dance, especially dances that weren't so structured and choreographed. The free movement of it inspired me. A good example would be pop-n-lock. It just seemed like such free movement that didn't initially seem possible. I would dance in my own time here and there, but it was never something I did actively, and never in front of other people. But that would eventually change.

     Throughout last year (in school year terms), I began gradually changing my taste in music. I would mostly listen to stuff like Dave Matthews Band, who, for a long time, was my favorite music artist. But in general, I would listen to much more contemporary and conventional music. But during that year, I got back into contact with my oldest, and one of my dearest friends, Mike Jehl. At the time, I believe he had been working for my dad's company. Over winter break, Mike and I, and another one of our mutual best friends, Matt Steffen, went out for the first time since the last world cup, when we drove down to St. Louis to visit Mike and enjoy the games. Matt opened my eyes to new musical possibilites. The two most prevalent of which would be Passion Pit and Crystal Castles. Most people know Passion Pit by now, but Crystal Castles remains relatively unknown. They are far on one side of the musical spectrum. Electronic, but much more so than others that we here every now and then. Both artists were I spent most of my time listening to. When we hung out over winter break, it was great. We danced like fools and it was great. They talked about other stuff that they had heard, one in particular: Skrillex. That night, I looked him up and boy, that was awesome. I've since found that I am generally not that into Dubstep, but I can really get into Skrillex.

     That next semester, we kept in contact more than we had in since high school. Towards the end of the school year, Matt put me onto another band: Cut Copy. It was love at first listen. "Feel the Love," was such a new sound to me. Anytime it came on, I had to dance to it. I found out Mike was also going through the same thing, and with the same song. It was such a great summer, listening to such interesting music and dancing with two of my oldest friends. I was moving away from the doing the same thing all the time, which generally entailed my "Every Day" friends coming over, just sitting there watching either Jersey Shore, or god forbid sports, and the occasional bonfire, which after a while, also lost it's luster. It was time for change, and this new music would be the instrument that would lead me there.

     I generally subscribed to Mike and Matt's recommendations, but Cut Copy always remained as the top contender, and still does to this day. I've all but stopped listening to Dave Matthews, and anything else? I can hardly remember what it was that I listened to in the first place. Mike introduced me to the French pop artist, Yelle, whom I adore. Other major artists include Cults, Neon Indian, TV on the Radio, some Deadmau5, Justice, M83, Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaur, and most recently, The Ashton Shuffle (which actually was suggested by one of my twitter friends, @42Meaningoflife).

     The more I listen, the more I dance, and the more I dance, I better I get. I am slowly becoming faster and more fluent in my movements. You'll eventually notice, if you haven't already that I really try to stay in the mind set that there really is no correct way to do something or think something. Dancing is a perfect example of this, it's sort of an implied mantra of mine that it doesn't necessarily matter what you do while you dance, just that you dance and love it. Feel the beat and the rhythm and you'll know what to do. Don't place so much into it. I did however, mention above that I am slowly getting better at dancing. Butto say that I am getting "better" would imply an intended goal. And what is that goal? To be able to dance like this:

     That song is by Yelle by the way. The way that these guy's move so quickly and fluid-like absolutely astounds me and it's this type of dancing that I love and aspire to be 'better' in.

     This is the point where I'll cut myself off. I leave you to listen to Cut Copy's awesome and danceable song, "Lights and Music." If you feel the need to dance, don't question it. Just do it and go with what feels best. There's no correct way to dance, as long as you feel the awesome emanating from the movement.

     Oh! and that embarrassment I would feel when dancing when I was younger? That's been gone for a long time now. I dance where ever, when ever, and I couldn't be happier.


Until Next time...